Chasing a dream
Andy looked at Sky, who was fast asleep next to him. Sky had suggested they celebrate their anniversary in Taipei. Since he hadn’t been out of Guilin for months, Andy had agreed to it. It was supposed to be a fun trip but he was tired. The new city, the big hotel, so many things to see — it was too much for him to handle.
He had dreamt the same dream earlier that night. It was like an action replay. It was the same guy. It was the same train. It was the same station. It was the same situation. He had run to catch up but failed. The train had pulled out of the station jolting Andy out of sleep.
Every time he was in the dream his mind would tell him to find out more, any bit of information. What was he wearing? What bag was he carrying? Who was with him? Only questions, questions, questions, but nothing gave him an inkling of an idea about who the guy was. Sigh. Living the dream over and over again was exhausting.
At least Sky knew what was happening in their lives. At least he knew what was good or bad. He wasn’t a bad guy but he was a stranger. It didn’t matter how much or how little Sky tried, he was just a friend. Andy knew in his heart he loved the guy from his dreams. He also knew he was living in the real world, where Sky was his lover. He had his duties towards Sky. The constant war between his heart and his brain made him restless.
He knew Sky was struggling as well. He had insisted they make love. He had argued that physical intimacy would break down the mental blockage Andy had. His body would recognize Sky’s and then, in turn, his mind would. It was a weird idea but Andy had agreed to play along. Andy had his own thoughts. If he could regain his memory, he’d remember about the guy from his dreams. That was his ultimate plan. To give his body to Sky was easy, but not his mind, or his love. So, with a heavy heart, he had let Sky make love to him. It had been awkward in the beginning and no matter what Sky tried, Andy could not relax. They’d laughed about it and then turned towards wine to lighten the mood. And then Andy had found a way. He used his mind to project the face of the guy from his dreams over Sky’s face. He imagined the dream guy making love to him.
###
“Hurry!” Sky said, as they tried to snake through the crowd at the Ximen station to get to the platform.
Andy was amazed to see how quickly Sky could walk with so many shopping bags while he struggled to keep up with him.
“Do we really need to run?” he asked. “We can always catch the next one.”
“Sorry.” Sky slowed down.
They walked down the steps and arrived at the platform. The train was crowded. They walked along the platform trying to find a door they could squeeze through, but it looked impossible.
And then Andy saw him. He was standing inside the train and chatting with a girl. It was him — the guy from his dreams! Andy wanted to shout but he wasn’t sure his voice would reach the guy.
“Hold them, please.” He handed the bags to Sky and walked to the window nearest to where the guy was. He waved his hands trying to catch the guy’s attention. The doors of the car began to close. Any attempt to run and push his way in would have resulted in chaos. What should he do?
“Hey! Hey, you! White shirt!” A few people standing on the platform turned towards him but the guy did not. The doors shut and the train started pulling out.
Andy felt helpless.
“Hey! Hey! Look here!” He waved wildly as he jogged with the train. The guy was busy talking to the girl with him.
Shit. The train picked up speed and Andy broke into a run. He slapped the window pane a few times as he tried to keep up with the car. “Look here!” He screamed.
The guy didn’t even look towards Andy. The noise and vibration from the train must be drowning his voice, he thought. He kept running and slapping the window.
Finally, the girl caught sight of him. She gave him a strange look, before nudging the guy to look towards Andy.
Just as the guy turned, hands grabbed Andy and held him back. The train pulled away. Andy was sure the guy hadn’t seen him. He gave up and sank to the floor in anguish. Sadness engulfed him. It was as if someone had ripped his heart out. So close and yet so far!
“What on earth were you doing?” Andy looked up to see two officers standing over him. They looked menacing and confused.
“He is with me, officer. I’m sorry.” Sky reached them.
Andy realized they were at the end of the platform.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“Do you have any idea how dangerous your actions were? Not only did you scare a lot of people but you’d have collided with the wall if we hadn’t stopped you.”
“Thank you, officer. We’re both very grateful. I apologize. We’re tourists here. He just saw someone on the train and wanted to catch their attention?” Sky looked at Andy.
“Yes, yes. I saw my friend.” Andy nodded his head. “I’m sorry.”
“Okay. Please, be careful next time. You almost gave us a heart attack.”
“Thank you,” said Sky, with a slight bow of head.
“Welcome to Taipei.” One of the officers smiled. “Enjoy your stay.”
Andy stood up as the officers walked away.
“Phew. That was close,” Sky said. “What were you trying to do? You almost got us arrested!”
“I’m sorry.”
Andy wanted to cry. But crying would only alarm Sky and make him worry.
“Let’s go.” Andy took some bags from Sky.
They got onto the next train and rode to the City Hall station in complete silence.
