On the rocks
Oliver knew it was time to walk back when two other couples joined them on the rocks. They were strangers. It was funny and embarrassing at the same time. At least, Diano had calmed down.
The beach had transformed into a different place. No kids ran about. Families had packed and left; lovers had arrived. Back at the BBQ site, his friends were still eating and teasing each other. The girls greeted Diano as they would a long lost friend. Oliver felt both jealous and proud at the same time.
Sometime later, people split up into smaller groups to walk around or chat. The breeze grew colder and cut through Oliver’s tee shirt making him shiver. He picked up a drink and walked down to the cemented path further down the same end of the beach. It looked romantic and he felt lonely. Oliver missed Energy. He missed their online matches. He laughed about their fight over game consoles — Xbox 360 or PS3. While he supported the Xbox, Energy had been a sucker for PS3. Each had gone out and bought the one they liked. But then they couldn’t play each other over the internet. After a few days of frustration and hanging out at each other’s places, they had gone and bought what the other had. So both owned an Xbox 360 and a PS3!
Priscilla had insisted on a Wii. He had bought her one as a Christmas gift. After she walked out on him, he’d never bothered switching it on. It was still at his place.
Oliver thought about the time they had spent on picking the flat and moving in. She’d insisted on a balcony while he didn’t really want one. Living on a top floor of a high-rise building in a flat with an open balcony was not his idea of safety. No, he wasn’t afraid of heights. He had gone parasailing, paragliding and bungee jumping before. No, it was something else. Anyway, that wasn’t what he wanted to think about.
They had spent a lot of time looking for the right match of furniture, curtains and bedspreads to go with the light green walls. It had been a success in the end and everybody at their housewarming party had been impressed.
They had made plans for their future. Sigh. How different life was now! He was in Shanghai when she’d chosen to pick her things up. He didn’t even bother to check his valuables. He didn’t care about them. She hadn’t returned the keys yet. Somewhere deep inside him, he expected her to return one day. But how long was he supposed to wait? If only there were a sign. He understood what it meant to be dumped without a valid reason. Dumped without a chance at discussing and trying to fix the problems in their relationship. Just dumped. He could empathize with Diano.
“What are you doing here?” It was Tina. He hadn’t heard her walk up from behind.
“Nothing. How are you doing?”
“I’m good. It’s great to see you all. How are you?” She stood beside him and looked out at the sea.
“I’m fine.”
“Really?”
“Yes.” He was not but he didn’t want to talk about his problems.
“Good. Good.” She smiled at him. “Your friend’s cute.”
“Yeah. Looks like you girls love him very much.” Oliver laughed.
“And you?”
“What about me?”
“Do you love him?” She looked at his face.
“Why do you ask that?”
“Because you two looked cute on those rocks. I know it’s not my business.”
“It’s okay lah.” There was an awkward pause while he tried to come up with the exact words that could describe what he wanted to say. “I don’t know,” he muttered in the end.
Silence. Then she laughed.
“Okay. Take your time. There’s no hurry.”
“I really don’t know. I loved Priscilla and look at where it got me. Diano has been dumped twice in succession. I can understand his feelings. And I think he’s a cool guy to hang out with. I like him very much. Love? I don’t know yet. Is it early to think about that? Is it even right to think about that?”
“Why not?” She put a hand on his shoulder, like she always did whenever she wanted to lecture him. “Love doesn’t ask your permission, boy. It happens. If you feel it inside, it already exists. You don’t need to care about what the world thinks.”
“I know that.”
“Then? What’s your problem?” she asked.
“I love him. I can feel it. But it is not a sexual kind of feeling. Do you know what I mean?”
“No. But go on.”
“I care about him. I realized that when I met him for the second time. He doesn’t even remember anything about the first time we met.”
“Why?”
“He was very drunk and had passed out. I drove him and his friend home. And then I carried him to the 7th floor by stairs!”
“What happened to the lifts?”
“There were none!” He laughed. “It’s an old building.”
“Then?”
“Nothing. I went home.”
“Aw.”
“I never told him about that night. He doesn’t know I had helped him out, only his friend does. But I haven’t told her I hang out with him.”
“Why?”
“I don’t want him to feel embarrassed. It wasn’t the best of introductions. I used a fake name even!”
“Why would you do that?!”
“I don’t want him to feel embarrassed. It was his weak moment.”
“Wow. Chan Wai Chun!” She gave him a hug.
“I don’t know what I’m doing or what I’m gonna do.”
“That’s okay. Sometimes, in life, you need to let things take their own course.”
“Thanks, Tina.” He gave her a hug.
“Now, let’s go and find your boy.”
“He is not my boy lah.”
“Whatever. Let’s go and join the others. We wanna go cycling tomorrow morning. Do you want to invite Diano?”
“Why not?”
As they walked back, Oliver felt relaxed and happy. He was thinking about what Tina had just said. Yes. He should let things take their own course.
